“That boy is heading for a fall” is what I thought looking at today’s episode. Little did I realise that it would arrive before the end of the show.

He’s in the midst of a period of strife. April & Dexter’s betrayal has hit him hard and he’s in a bad place mentally. Sure he didn’t even feel like earning an honest living delivering pizza, hooning off with Summer was a preferable way to occupy his time. Not happy with mitching off work, he stole a work vehicle and took a passenger. Their joyride didn’t last and they ended up in a heap at the side of the road. I don’t fancy Summer’s chances given that she’s such a minor character, they’re easily expendable. If Gina doesn’t kill Xavier when she finds out, Brax will.

What’s up with Indi? She threw a strop over Roo & Sid despite the fact herself and her bloke are living with Roo. Talk about biting the hand that feeds. There has to be more to it than that. Could it be that married bliss isn’t all she had hoped it would be? If they do break up, it will be setting a new record for short lived relationships. The summer bay time-warp strikes again.

I don’t know why I’m surprised H&A is going on holidays; it does every year. Glenroe used to do that as well. Does Fair City?

Hurray for funny Marilyn coming back. She had a dream that told her it’s time for her to pick up the hairdryer again and re-enter the world of hairdressing. Sure she must be an expert, if her own barnet is anything to go on. The dream was brought on by a session with Miles. I think she came out of that one the victor.

Everyone in the Bay has Roo talked into a relationship with Sid, before they’ve even so much as put up a fairy light. She may as well go for it now.

Dex and April decided to keep their relationship under wraps by kissing on the beach. Class. Of course Xavier spotted them. Cue rows.

The newly returned newlyweds got an unexpected greeting from Marilyn when they arrived at the farm, unexpected for Sid.  He didn’t know what way to look – I’ve already broken up with this woman and here she is pretending she still lives here and we’re still going out.  But now the secret is out in the open, Sid can get back to resuming his attempts to woo Roo.

Another newly single man is Xavier. April unceremoniously dumped him, not revealing her true feelings for Dex, or the fact they had a secret pash. Xav is left feeling foolish and forlorn. His plans of a schoolies trip with the gang are up in smoke. I’m not sure quite what a schoolies trip is but it sounds class. The fact that Gina is dead against it makes me think it would be fun.

April is feeling guilty about not coming clean with Xavier but doesn’t feel the time is right.  How foolish.  Does she not know that her secret will be public knowledge in a matter of minutes? Xav is going to go looking for answers and walk in on the illicit affair, mid pash. I fear that will be more than his limited brain cells can handle.

Who have been naughty boys then? Only Sid and his son Dex.

First Sid, aka Dr Dish, tried it on with Roo and got slapped down. She was having none of it. Sid and Marilyn are still together, and she didn’t fancy being the other woman. Sid decided to slink back to Oz with his tail between his legs. After a quick chat with Marty, Roo had a change of heart, ran out to stop Sid’s taxi and reveal the contents of her heart.  She was too slow to get there in time. No surprise as she was wearing one of her trademark voluminous dresses, which nearly tripped her on the way.

Dex showed that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.  He went over to April’s and planted one on her but he too got rejected.  She has morals and a boyfriend which stopped her from engaging with Dex, for at least a few minutes. Once she thought about it, she reckoned it was partly her fault as she’d been giving out signals. Cue change of mind and a massive pash.

The walker men have a profound effect on the women of the bay. Spare a thought for the fallout from their romance. Both Marilyn and Xavier are just collateral damage on the romantic road of Walker way.

Charlie came to the rescue at the beach, calling an ambulance when Ruby couldn’t. Xavier went back to the hospital and is grand. As someone pointed out the last time he was in, young males in Summer Bay General are not allowed to wear tops. Anyway, Gina and John had to pass up a trip to Hawaii to keep an eye on the surfing champ.

Dex and Kate called it a day, and April copped on that Dex lurves her. Cue loadsa coy, meaningful glances.

Colleen is amazing. She reckons The Man Upstairs has it in for her, after the small electrocution, due to her gossiping ways. Elijah called over and she went mental. Brilliant. I especially like Morag as nursemaid.

So, a ragtag group of Summer-Bay-ites take off to dangerous Nelson’s Noose for a bit of surfing, etc. Unsurprisingly, there are revelations (Dexter told April he’s paying Kate in tutelage), and DISASTER! Xavier was pulled out of the surf in an unconscious state. Good timing though, Dex was about to declare his true feelings for April. Nice one, Xav.

Ruby is in the clear, her sexual health is impeccable. So that means bould Emily infected Romeo. They should have dragged the STD storyline out for ages longer, it would have affected nearly everyone in the Bay.

In today’s episode, it was Charlie’s birthday. Morag has copped on about the Sergeant and Mr. Braxton, so it’ll be out in no time.

Dex went on a date with Summer. It didn’t work out as he only has eyes for April. Xavier likes the look of Summer though, maybe they’ll swap?

Help us solve this mystery, where did the chlamydia originate? Have we left someone out?

Edit: it doesn’t matter, Ruby doesn’t have chlamydia, so the buck stops with Emily.

So, Xavier and John “rescued” the laydeez from the perils of the bush. Or they had a mudfight and the girls were grand anyway. It was pretty funny when they caked each other in mud.

Liam is trying to get his head sorted. Bianca is finding this hard to take, she wants to wait for Liam but he is having none of that.  In fairness to Ireland’s own, he seems genuine about fixing his addiction issues once and for all, for himself, and not for anyone else.

April seems a bit upset by the whole process. She did her best to get Liam and Bianca back together but it seems like a lost cause.  I really hope that Bianca doesn’t “move on” with Heath Braxton.  Whatever Liam’s problems are, he’s not as much as a drop kick Heath.

Colleen told Keith to hit the road. She’s not happy with her decision, though. He might be back yet. Here he is being scared by nothing:

Marilyn is very easily led. A few words from Colleen, and she’s proposing marriage to Sid. The doctor was quite unimpressed with the suggestion. He went straight to Roo aka The Oracle of Summer Bay for some advice.

Liam went to his investigation high on his unnamed drugs. The Cigire thought he was locked. Bye bye teaching job. Teaching hurts so much. Summer Bay HIGH indeed. Bianca served up an ultimatum, but Liam chose the gear.

Dex is having trouble with Xavier and April’s rekindled romance. He went to Romeo (not Roo for some reason) for advice. In the end, Dex told April how strange it was and now everyone’s mates again. But, he still LOOOOOVES April.