Easily swayed

Monday, November 3rd, 2014

Ah lads, this is hard to watch. Poor simple Andy Barrett thinks Jake is his new best mate, and is hanging on his every word. THE BLEEDIN DOPE.

We in H&AI HQ were nearly feeling sorry for lovelorn Maddie there, until she was a total wagon to Evie.

Everyone’s keeping an eye on Oscar since his exercise coma, that’ll get tiresome quick.

Brax and Ricky don’t seem to bother going to their jobs on a regular basis.

This is not work

This is not work

A chance for redemption

Friday, October 24th, 2014

Brax leaning

While engaging in some classic leaning, Brax told Casey about himself and Ricky trying for a baby. Casey managed to persuade him to help Andy, he needs the support that the Braxton boys gave each other if he’s to turn his life around. Brax held out a hand of friendship to Andy but got it thrown back in his face. Andy got a job offer from Cody and lads who were threatening him last week, they were impressed with his drug selling abilities.

Jett was worried that he might get displaced now that John’s real child has arrived in town. John reassured him that this wasn’t a problem but as they were arguing in the garden they ended up soaking Marilyn with a garden hose, such laughs.

Oscar is still on his crazy fitness buzz. After his community service he got dropped off in the bush so he could run home. This wasn’t the best plan as he was on his own on a country path with the sun beating down. He got heat stroke and passed out. Will Zac and Hannah be able to find him in time?

HSC hooning

Wednesday, October 22nd, 2014

In the space of one episode, Sasha went from failing her HSC to, um, not failing it. Zac was just acting the tough teacher for a while. Matt owned up to his amazing poetry skills, and all was well.

Oscar loves that oul’ gym. He can’t get enough. Or, maybe he can; 8 chest extensions had him staggering around the place like a drunk. He got pretty angry when Spencer and Maddie told him to ease off, look!

Oscar SMASH!

Oscar SMASH!

Kidnap and torture

Saturday, October 18th, 2014

RTE player staff got a bit confused with Friday’s episode. This sounds like a plot from ten years ago.

RTE player out of date info

Click to enlarge, you flamin’ galah

Cody and his toughs turned up to get some info on Andy’s whereabouts. First they put the hurt on Casey at the gym but all that succeeded in doing was dragging Brax away from the house to rescue his bro. Little did he know that this was what they wanted all along. As soon as he left Braxton Towers for the gym, they went over to capture Josh and Evelyn, who they took to the farm for kidnap and interrogation. Kyle is going to be annoyed when he finds out, some kidnapping in the Bay that he wasn’t involved in. Where was Kyle anyway? The lads forced Josh to leave a message for Andy, telling him to come and rescue them. Will the selfish mongrel turn up? What if Oscar and Hannah show up first?

John got a surprise when Shandi turned up in the diner. They had a chat on the beach and seemed to have straightened things out a bit. Everything was going fine until he told her about Jett; she lost the plot when she heard he had a foster son. Things will be a bit bumpy for a while but she’ll be grand once she acclimatises to the Bayside way of life.

Trouble ahoy

Monday, October 6th, 2014

Andy still owes his cash to the dealer. Casey asked Brax for help but got shot down. Casey gave Andy some cash from the gym to keep him going but will it be enough to keep Cody off his back and stop Josh from getting bashed again?

Maddy is having a great time jumping around on the beach and taking O-zone to the bone zone, far better than going to school. Roo sat her down and told her it wasn’t fair to use Oscar to get back at Josh and Evelyn, so she dumped him. Poor Oscar, back into the friend zone.

Sasha is having problems with her poetry. It turns out Matt is a poetic genius and submitted his poem with her name on it, unbeknownst to Sasha. She’ll get an A and then go mad when she finds out it is for his poem.  I reckon I could do better than Sasha’s effort.

Phoebe is a snitch while Maddy is a bitch
Sid misses his ditch and Cheryl is a witch
Brax says “Oi”, Harley’s a baby boy
When Andy shows his face, Hannah jumps for joy

 

Feel free to put your own poem in the comments.

Maddie going mad

Thursday, October 2nd, 2014

It’s Maddie’s turn to have a go at being a wayward teen. She’s going to try it on with Oscar, to get back at Evie for stealing Josh, and she’s talking about leaving school. She does great brat, to be fair.

Apportioning blame

Apportioning blame

Jett is going to be John’s best man. Deadly. That buck’s night is going to be mental. Chris is hanging around like a bad smell, trying to be invited. Doesn’t John know that, in the grand old Home and Away tradition, you’re supposed to have someone you barely know in the bridal party?

 

Cop caller

Friday, September 12th, 2014

Spencer is insistant that he’s going to call the cops, despite Josh having told him that Andy got rid of the drugs. Unbeknownst to Josh,  Andy had just hidden them on the farm rather than getting rid of them. The cops turned up to question Andy and took him in for questioning in front of Hannah, Josh and Evie. Josh saw Spencer on the beach and blamed him for Andy’s arrest and punched his lights out, even though Spencer denied calling the old bill in the first place.

Psychic twins alert! Ozone knew that Evie was upset by using his mental powers. Evie went to confront Zac over his plan to move out. He can’t handle Andy and Hannah so he wants to leave them to it but the twins want him to stay.

Darcy was missing so Heath and Brax went looking for her. She was afraid to go to the hospital with her sore arm. Some friend of Darcy’s went to the hospital once and didn’t get to return home so Darcy was afraid that the same thing might happen to her.

Ozone

Monday, September 8th, 2014

There is great mickey-swinging going on down at the farm at the moment. Oscar (aka Ozone) was starting his community service with conflicting advice from Zac and Andy. Zac advocated keeping his head down, while Andy said Ozone should go in all guns blazing, so that no-one would mess with him. Guess who was right? Poor Oscar ended up like something out of True Blood, once the local hoons were finished with him.

Vampire Oscar

Vampire Oscar

In a related matter, apparently you can do community service topless in Australia.

Vests optional

Vests optional

Kyle and Phoebe are moving in together, and looking for a flat. They are very fussy. As a friend of ours might say, it’s not their forever house. Anyway, they remembered that Kyle being a former convict might prove tricky. No way, lads?

Roo has meningitis I hear. She’s been out of action for a good while now, should I ready the wall of death?

Alf cries; we all cry

Thursday, September 4th, 2014
Worried Alf

Worried Alf

Roo is still in Summer Bay General and her condition looks to be worsening. She had a seizure after Alf told her to wake up. Rebellious to the last.

Casey and Denny are a bona fide thing now, he even went to the farm for dinner. He also slept in his car as he wouldn’t be able to control himself if he went back for his displaced car keys. Eh what?

Chris is taking a duvet day as he’s finding Denny’s hasty new coupling a bit troubling.

Zac pretended he and Oscar were going on a pre-arranged camping trip, so he wouldn’t have to have dinner with Andy. I’d be inclined to do the same thing.

A mud hut in Mangrove River

Thursday, August 28th, 2014

John and Marilyn were having trouble fitting in at the caravan park, so they decided to look at buying a new property. However, purchasing was proving too expensive, so renting was the next option they considered. Hannah and Oscar chipped in with some impromptu real estate advice, but the lovebirds finally decided to give John’s house another go. Much ado about nothing there, lads.

Heath was offering advice too. He told Andy that Hannah clearly doesn’t consider him her relationship equal. Andy took this on board and confronted Hannah.

Phoebe went off half-cocked and decided to sell anything her father ever gave. Luckily, Kyle (in a YOLO tshirt) talked some sense into her.

YOLO, Kyle

YOLO, Kyle

Roo was still complaining of “jet lag”. She mentioned it four or five times. Now, when someone complains of an ailment in Summer Bay, they usually die of it shortly after (see Gina and her headaches). Roo later collapsed due to said mystery ailment. So, what do ye reckon? Cancaaah?

Harley wore another hat.

bring back miles
Original image from This is Oz



all the dead


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