What a mad episode. Marilyn introduced her ventriloquist’s dummy, Mr. Oddley, to Alf, who had a flashback to when he was five and a puppet scared the bejaysus out of him. Young Alf said “strike me roan” and ran into the arms of his father, who happened to be the mirror image of current Alf. Also, Morag was a little ginger girl who was dressed as a witch – very subtle, Home and Away scriptwriters!
Angelo took a settlement outside of court and as a consequence, he’ll never work as a cop again. He’ll just be Mr. Risotto from now on. Serves him right anyway, for letting a known criminal escape. To mark the occasion, he got locked, lit a bonfire on the beach, and burned his uniform. He also burned his underwear for some reason. Was he wearing police underwear?
“I’m no lawyer love, but it seems to me that Aden’s in a bit of strife”, proclaimed Alf to Nicole when discussing her boyfriend’s upcoming murder charge. He may not have his sister’s law skills but he has her whipped when it comes to understatements.
Marilyn has returned to the bay after 10 years away in Blighty. But who is she and what makes her so popular in the Bay? Here is the lowdown for those fans who don’t remember her from the first time around.
She ran a beauty parlour out the back of the old diner and gave facials to Madge Wilkins et al.
Marilyn used to be Morag’s housekeeper. It provided some great comedy as they were the ultimate odd couple. It’ll be interesting to see how they get on the next time Morag turns up in the Bay.
Marilyn went out with Lance Smart, Colleen’s son. Colleen seems to bear a grudge about their break up.
Lance, Marilyn and Martin Dibble were in a band together that went national for a brief time. I can’t remember what they were called. Lance got jealous as the press insinuated that Marilyn was going out with Martin, not Lance. This caused the band to split up.
Donald “Flathead” Fisher married Marilyn in an unlikely liaison. They had a baby called Byron but he sadly passed away. His poor parents were distraught and Marilyn got depressed and fled to London. Irene and Flathead went to look for her. Their method of searching involved touring the city on an open top bus. Preposterous as this may sound, they managed to find her.
It’s good to have her back and I’m sure she’ll provide us with much hilarity. She seems to have ditched her habit of wearing tiny backpacks as handbags.
Building on the bonza idea that Drew’s Shrew had about a cross-over Home and Away/Heroes show, commenter Sorry for being a crazy dingo has given us a deadly list of Home and Away character super-powers:
ALF – grows gills when he jumps in the water and swims underwater, like a fish which is kind of ironic.
COLLEEN – able to speak any language at will and talk to animals, that means she can gossip with anyone or anything.
MILES – the ability to eat food without ever getting full. (Sounds like a crappy superpower, but in later seasons he will discover he has a psychic conscience named Rabbit).
NICOLE – the ability to attract any person at will with her beauty.
JAI – the ability to be invincible.
IRENE – the ability to attract troubled children into her lair.
ANGELO – the ability to cause amnesia to others (everyone, including Martha, seems to have forgiven him for killing Jack and covering up the murder).
CHARLIE – the ability to change sexuality at will.
RUBY – the ability to screech so loud, it causes one’s ears to bleed.
GINA – the ability to convince people that she’s actually Tony’s sister and not his grandmother.
XAVIER – the same ability as Ruby.
MARTHA – the ability to never grieve and be constantly sexually promiscuous.
LIAM – the ability to be completely forgotten about only few months after being an Australian megastar.
ADEN – the same ability as Martha.
LEAH – the ability to be as sexy as Penelope Cruz but no-one in town appearing to notice.mink
RACHEL – the ability to heal, in all areas of medicine.
TONY – the ability of super strength.
ROMEO – the ability to to…eh…surf…REALLY REALLY WELL. (That one sucked).
MINK – the ability to stare at someone and kill them. What a bad ass!
VJ – the ability to shoot water bombs from his hands.
MORAG – the ability to be the best lawyer ever.
RABBIT – the ability to rise from the dead, be psychic and make herself invisible to all but Miles.
What do you reckon? Do you have any others to add?
That Robert Robertson is one smart cookie. He knew that Charlie wasn’t the killer but he arrested her anyway to force Ross to confess. His plan worked like a dream. I suppose it helped that all of his suspects were considerably stupider than him.
So now that his job is complete with a confession in hand, Robert has bid good day to the bay. His brief liason with Leah went nowhere much but at least it meant that she had a slightly more interesting storyline than her usual one of a busy lunchtime order in the Diner. One thing he has left us with is a new nickname for Morag. Battleship Potemkin will stay with us forever.
OK, does Geoff only have one white vest? And when it’s in the wash, has he no choice but to walk around topless?
Xavier is wise to Geoff and Ruby. He warned Geoff off and after looking mega-confused for a while, Geoff agreed to leave Ruby alone.
Ruby’s not impressed though.
Nicole is going to the next level with Liam Murphy the rock star. This is a disaster in Kirsty’s eyes. I’d say Kirsty is jealous. Maybe she just wants a roll on the beach herself.
Charlie’s police radio went off in the diner – AT FULL BLAST. I’m surprised all the customers didn’t follow her to the police emergency.
Angelo, under slight duress, spilled the beans about his undercover operation. People-smuggling! Exotic! He thinks it’s Hugo running the show, but I bet it’s not. Who could it be? Palmer? Morag? Colleen? The excitement!
Flamin’ Mongrel alerted us to the fact that everyone’s favourite beauty therapist, Marilyn, is returning to the Bay! Hopefully she can sort out Nicole’s eyeliner. And Irene’s hair. And Morag’s lipstick.
Ruby’s stalking her rapist da on cool new networking site Spont Me. What is Spont? Is that an Aussie term or something? It sounds rude. Cue loads of anguished faces from Charlie when she finds out!
Morag has moved back in with Aden after Ross shipped himself off to a nursing home. Poor oul’ Ross, he was sound. Morag’s ruling the roost already though, she’ll have Aden forgetting his dead wife in no time.
Nicole tried to crack on to Dr. Sid (who has a lovely house), but he was having none of it. That’ll soon change. A bit more pouting and I’d say she’ll have him.
P.S. Xavier described himself as a “total knob” today. Where did you learn that blue language, Xave?
“I don’t want to be Wowser about it” was what Miles had to say when doubting Kirsty’s ability to balance Uni and home life. What the hell is a Wowser?
Poor Morag got battered again. Ross accidentally smacked her in the face but sure it was as bad as the time Alf/Ailsa threw her down the stairs, which you can see here. Ailsa got way meaner when she came back from the dead as Alf’s imaginary friend.
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