So Doctor Sid discovered that Mink has a disease (which I can’t spell), which means she can’t surf professionally anymore. Romeo very soundly offered to share his surf teaching business with her, but she left town. She’ll be back.

Stew/Stu chased Sasha down when she refused a lift from him. Later she turned up with some torso bruises. Please let Sid batter Stew soon.

Alf is gathering the troops and organising his campaign. A mighty sight.

As per usual, I was left wondering what Roo was wearing. Her dress looked like a really poor floor print. Despite yet another fashion faux pas, it didn’t stop her telling Harvey where to get off when he asked her to be his campaign manager. Fair dinkum. She’s determined that Harvey won’t win the council elections but how can she stop him? By getting her dad on board, Alf’s had all he can stand and can’t stand no more, he’s running against Harvey and I’m backing him to win.

Brax suggested that Heath join himself and Charlie in the city. I thought it was a mental idea but Charlie agreed to go along with it. Is Heath not an adult? Surely he can make his own way in life without having Brax babysit him.

How many times was Romeo topless in that episode? Only twice by my count. Minx is causing all kinds of problems between Romeo and Indi. Mink reckons that Indi is stopping Romeo from doing what he really wants to do. Mink borrowed more money from Romeo so that she could compete in a surf comp, unbeknownst to Indi. Her competition revealed the truth to Romeo, Mink’s lost her bottle, she’s losing competitions all over the place and turning up drunk. Poor thick Romeo, Mink has him wrapped around her little finger.

Mink is hanging around like a bad smell. Somehow she thinks there is loads of money in the Bank of Romeo. Indi even offered to give her her day spa voucher, and she threw it on the ground. Inconsiderate cahhhhh. Romeo later said he’d have money for her by the end of the week. But Mink isn’t allowed to tell Indi. Bad move Romeo.

Sid met new Doctor Kerrie at Irene’s and asked her out for lunch. Irene found out Roo still has eyes for the doc and got into a terrible fluster. She told Sid, who wasn’t impressed with Kerrie’s lack of opinions anyway.

Stu made friends with Sid and got Sasha’s grounding lifted. Sasha reluctantly went to the beach with The Basher. Later Xavier found her moaning on a bench, and took her to hospital. I call infected tattoo. Xave must have enjoyed that, normally he’s the patient.

Liam is staying with Bianca in Irene’s house to recover from his jam stains. Where did Liam live before this, in a caravan? How much room is there in Irene’s house? Loads by the looks of it.

Bianca and April are having sisterly tiffs over their respective love lives. Usually it’s April who has more sense but Bianca looks smarter this time, moving on from Heath to Liam. April is displaying a lot of interest in Heath, an unhealthy amount. She must be very hot, she came home at night after a day out still wearing her bikini. Xavier set her up by tricking her into going to the pizzaria where Dex was waiting. April believed him that he didn’t do Dallas but still broke up with him over his boorish bragging.

Xavier seemed happy to see Mink and vice versa. She’s not back five minutes and is already causing trouble. She scabbed a free lunch from Indi and borrowed money from Romeo. Indi is wise to her scams but Romeo is too trusting. She wants to borrow money as she’s in a bit of strife but where is Romeo going to get two thousand dollars? He’s making a fortune teaching the schoolies to surf but that won’t go on forever. Indi wants him to think of the future but he can’t see past tomorrow, poor boy.

Was what Dex was saying, well almost. It was more the reaction he got in the diner that he liked rather than the actual kiss itself. Needless to say, April didn’t like it. It’ll take some time for things to get back to normal with them, if ever.

Harvey is blackmailing John Palmer over receiving gifts as a councillor. He said he’d drop it if Roo got back with him. What is it with ex boyfriends trying to blackmail their ex girlfriends recently between him and Stu?

Indi started her internship which involved buying coffee for Dennis and posing in her bikini. She’s clearly headed for the top of the business world. Romeo was none too pleased when he found out and tried to lay down the law, expecting her to be the obedient wife but she was having none of it. Not really turning out to be wedded bliss for the newlyweds.

Mink is back, great news. She was a right royal pain in the hole the first time round, doubt anything’s changed there.

Ruby was having yet another bad hair day. What the hell Roobs?

Oh, Colleen is on rare oul’ form these days; in that episode she was giving out yards about the “graffiti bandits” aka Mad Miles terrorising the caravan park, and ensuring she is living in a “psychedelic nightmare”.  I think they’ve assigned Robert Robertson’s scriptwriter to her.

Xavier told Ruby about the cash he’s sitting on.  How did he keep it for this long?  He’s lucky Mink didn’t run off with it, or Romeo didn’t tell Annie.  Anyway, now that Ruby knows, it’s only a matter of time before Charlie aka the cops find out.  He should just buy a flash car and be done with it.

Tony, in a stupid move, has started to teach Xavier boxing.  Gina has already expressed extreme disgust for the sport.  Duh, Tony.  Don’t cross the headmistress.  Everyone knows that.

Gina fairly bulldozed through Mink’s tough defences when she called around for a chat.  Gina’s been through the mill herself, you see, when her husband left her to raise her sons alone.  And Gawd knows those three were a handful.  So she knows a pretence when she sees one.  Perhaps we should be calling her the new Pippa?

Building on the bonza idea that Drew’s Shrew had about a cross-over Home and Away/Heroes show, commenter Sorry for being a crazy dingo has given us a deadly list of Home and Away character super-powers:

1. ALF:  grows gills when he jumps in the water and swims underwater, like a fish which is kind of ironic.
2. COLLEEN:  able to speak any language at will and talk to animals, that means she can gossip with anyone or anything.
3. MILES:  the ability to eat food without ever getting full. (Sounds like a crappy superpower, but in later seasons he will discover he has a psychic conscience named Rabbit).
4. NICOLE:  the ability to attract any person at will with her beauty.
5. JAI:  the ability to be invincible.
6. IRENE: the ability to attract troubled children into her lair.
7. ANGELO: the ability to cause amnesia to others (everyone, including Martha, seems to have forgiven him for killing Jack and covering up the murder).
8. CHARLIE: the ability to change sexuality at will.
9. RUBY: the ability to screech so loud, it causes one’s ears to bleed.
10. GINA: the ability to convince people that she’s actually Tony’s sister and not his grandmother.
11. XAVIER: the same ability as Ruby.
12. MARTHA: the ability to never grieve and be constantly sexually promiscuous.
13. LIAM: the ability to be completely forgotten about only few months after being an Australian megastar.
14. ADEN: the same ability as Martha.
15. LEAH: the ability to be as sexy as Penelope Cruz but no-one in town appearing to notice.
16. RACHEL: the ability to heal, in all areas of medicine.
17. TONY: the ability of super strength.
18. ROMEO: the ability to surf REALLY REALLY WELL. (That one sucked).
19. MINK: the ability to stare at someone and kill them. What a bad ass!
20. VJ: the ability to shoot water bombs from his hands.
21. MORAG: the ability to be the best lawyer ever.
22. RABBIT: the ability to rise from the dead, be psychic and make herself invisible to all but Miles.

What do you reckon? Do you have any others to add?

Well Alf certainly read Irene the riot act – imagine not looking after THE BLENDER in a Juice Baaa!  It’s understandable that he was irritable though; he had just spoken to Miles who was acting like a class A eejit.  Just go to bed, son.  Unless you really want the AbCruncher 2000.

Oooh will Romeo go to school or will he go around the world to surf championships?  My money’s on school, and I bet Mink goes too.  She’ll be a crook kid gone straight in no time.

Mink thought she was dead hard telling Xavier about her crime of passion. Sure murder is nothing special in Summer Bay. In fact, it’s the least of the local worries – top of that list is finding a spot on the beach to sit and think about your woes.

Leah has caught the Alf bug and then some; she’s falling apart. There she was, sitting on the floor, roaring crying. Maybe she was trying to recreate the riot scenes. That’s what she did then too. She should invite Irene, Ruby and Colleen around to complete the picture.

Geoff gave Ruby a good telling-off. Her moaning about how she was to blame for the riot tipped him over the edge. I don’t think fairy lights will win him around this time.