Thursday, December 1st, 2011

There was a collective shout of OHHHHH in our house just now, as preteen Lily told prospective da Mark that mammy Gypsy was being bold on the beach with Liam Murphy, all-round rockstar. The only one I feel sorry for is Irene. She’s trying to recover from chemo in the midst of many dramas. At least her illness means she can get Lily to do the dishes.

Charlie was ready to ride Brax, but found his lawyer’s earring in his car. That car sees some action.

Leah is being a wagon to Miles. I hope they do break up. She’s telling him he pushed her into going ahead with the pregnancy. He did in his HOOP, Leah.

Pash central

Wednesday, November 23rd, 2011

Bianca caught Liam and Gypsy doing slidey slidey on the beach, so she retaliated by pashing with Heath on the couch. She came to her senses though, and legged it.

Ma Braxton is a Class A wagon. She ran up 70,000 in debt on the pokies, and Brax now has to pay for her lawyer instead of Casey’s. She nicked an iPod for Casey then asked him for money. All the while she’s saying things like “You boys would do anything for your mum”. Emotional blackmail by millions!

Lily told Gypsy she knows about the boarding school. I wouldn’t worry if I were her. Mark will be a dot on the horizon soon.

Bayside story

Tuesday, November 22nd, 2011

What’s going on with Liam and Bianca now? I thought they were broken up, for good this time. But when Liam called over to Heath’s gaff to find her in his robe, he was severely miffed.  He stormed off for a mope thinking she was with Heath.

Gypsy had a row with Lily and went for a walk which meant that she bumped into Murph.   She didn’t seem too bothered by the fact that she has a boyfriend and indulged in some extra curricular liaisons with the rockstar/waiter.  Cue Bianca finding them caught up in their passion?

What is Harvey playing at? Romeo is dead sus, thinking his plan is to do him out a big charter business.  He even tried to warn Roo off him, to no avail. She seems happy enough with him, for now. I can’t see it lasting given his devious nature.

The h&a makeup artists deserves credit for Irene’s complexion in recent episodes. She looks like death warmed up. I wouldn’t be too surprised to see her turn up in an episode of the Walking dead.

Snared rapid

Wednesday, November 16th, 2011

Casey is royally screwed now. YCPD snared him on cctv heading to Jake’s and coming back.  Doesn’t tally with his alibi of being in bed sick.

Heath told Casey that he had to leg it, go on the run. So eff the HSC, it’s a life of crime for him. Ruby is distraught and will have to pine for him while he’s away. How long before Ruby spills the beans to Charlie?

The tension between Bianca and Gypsy is simmering away.  Does Bianca want Liam back? Himself and Gypsy reckon not but she doesn’t want him to be with anyone else, namely Gypsy.  Little Lily clearly favours the Ireland’s own Murphy over her mother’s current boyfriend, and tried to blackmail her into choosing Liam.  Lily has a bit of a divil in her, taking after her mother.

Return of the Rockstar

Tuesday, November 15th, 2011

Liam Murphy took to the stage in Angelo’s and Gypsy was LOVING it. A budding romance, no doubt. Lily will be delighted. She thinks her ma is going to marry her flash boyfriend and leave her in the dust. That’s why she’s being such a brat.

Everyone is sad about Leah’s lost baby. Poor cute Veej was going to teach him to play football. Veej had a touch of Henry XVIII about him as he declared the baby was definitely a boy. Leah is pushing Miles away. Leah, noooooooooo!

Irene is doing it tough after her chemo. Her carers are terrible, they’re barely in the house to look after her. Plus they are both crushing on Rockstar Liam Murphy. LOVE TRIANGLE YO


Wednesday, November 2nd, 2011

Mr. Braxton McBraxerton didn’t get to kill Hammer’s drive-by bud at Tegan’s funeral, because his ma snitched to the pigs in an effort to keep her son on the straight and narrow. The shooter was some nondescript fool under Hammer’s control. Poor fella. Charlie and Constable Watson fairly put manners on him.

Brax then decided to just shoot Hammer, so said goodbye to Ma Braxton and went back to his house for the gun. Charlie and Constable Watson came to the door and hauled him down to the cop shop. Foiled again! Someone burned down Jake’s gang headquarters. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a sign saying “Gang HQ” over the door. Brax denied all knowledge. Who did it then?

Cut to Casey going mental in the kitchen, covered in soot. Tut, tut Case. We all thought you didn’t “have it in you”.

Also, Irene is home from hospital, Gypsy and April rowed over cleaning, Gypsy has a new fella, Lily hates him.  Ta-dah!

Speedy Gonzales!

Monday, February 7th, 2011

Jaysus. All of a sudden it’s Bianca and Vittorio’s wedding day! Here’s what happened:

  • Bianca’s makeup was shocking, like Lily drew it on with a crayon. Also she was a weird colour.
  • Liam showed up looking extremely unkempt.
  • Bianca jilted Vittorio at the altar and went off with Liam on his motorbike. Not surprising.
  • Romeo, in an uncharacteristic move, punched Vittorio for no reason.
  • Alf gave Vittorio “sling yer hook” eyes.
  • Everyone started clapping! No sympathy for the Prince.
  • Gina and John saved the day by getting married instead. Eh, don’t you need paperwork down unda? And WHAT ABOUT BANDICOOT?
  • Ruby fell in love with Romeo when she spied him kissing Indi. She is a nutter.
  • There were some class shapes thrown at the wedding. Special mentions go to Veej and John.
  • Joanna made April go back to Europe with her.
  • Nicole confessed to Marilyn that she’s pregnant. Who’re ya having it for? Penn! Oooooh!
  • Robert of the House of Robertson rocked up to the wedding and arrested Alf.
  • Will stormed off very guiltily.
  • Sid looked confused.
  • Alf looked stoic.

Was that the most dramatic episode of all time?

It’s gonna take a lot to drag me away from you

Wednesday, January 26th, 2011

I watched an episode of South Park last night, in which Cartman and a few pals went off to Somalia to be pirates.  Sounds like Veej was watching it too.  He and Lily are planning on running off to Africa.  I’d love to know their travel plans.  Do Aussie airlines let pre-teens fly on their own?  Wait till you see how flustered Leah will be when Veej goes missing.  She can’t even handle a busy diner.  Will will probably tear Irene’s house down, brick by brick.

Joanna, ma of Bianca and April, warned Liam Murphy off her elder daughter.  Surely that’s just a challenge to the Summer Bay Rockstar?  And another thing, what happened to Liam’s house?

Gina told Xave and John about the plan to send the money to Hugo and Dumbo.  JP knows a lot about money laundering for a daycent Aussie businessman.  By the by, how come Xavier didn’t spend any of the money?  Not even to buy parts for his fixie car?

Will smash!

Saturday, January 22nd, 2011

That wasn’t a very good day for Will, now was it?  First he got some bad news in a letter so he went home to drown his sorrows with a few beers. Next Alf came around and gave him the sack.  Business is bad down the bait shop. Then Will rang Gypsy but she refused to talk to him or let him explain.

That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Will lost the plot and wrecked the gaff. Poor Irene and Lilly came home to find him smashing the place up.  The funniest part was watching him try to pull a piece of the worktop apart but he had to give up as it wasn’t moving.  Sad but funny at the same time.  Poor Will. Gawd save Ireland, Irene will have some clean up job, in more ways than one.

There’s been a murder

Wednesday, January 5th, 2011


Robert Robertson is back in force after his Christmas break. He’s interviewed a few of the locals and found out that Alf told Penn he’d “flamin’ kill” him, on the very night he was “murdered”.

I bet Penn’s hiding out somewhere. Probably with Hugo and Martha, in the secret Aussie hiding place.

Dr. Sid called around to deliver Nicole’s HIV results. She’s clear. That’s probably because she didn’t hang out with HIV Henk much.

Will and Irene had a good oul’ heart to heart.  He cheated on Gypsy and she ran away.  That’s why the young one is afraid Daddy Will Smith will run off too.  She doesn’t want to go to school either, probably because she’s the only child in Summer Bay.

bring back miles
Original image from This is Oz

all the dead

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