Romeo the ultimate dickhead

Saturday, May 4th, 2013

Romeo, in an unbelievably selfish move, left the Bay with Liam Murphy. He said goodbye to Indi in a letter, but neglected to mention that he had cancer. So, she was totally bamboozled. Sid was caught in the middle, and eventually told his daughter the truth. Good acting, poor Indi.

Ricky and Cheryl were stirring things up ’round the Braxtons, mentioning Adam to Bianca, and slagging off Kyle.

Brax gave Kyle a great lecture, about not letting Casey down. He’s a good man for a telling-off. So, Kyle apologised to Casey.

Heath, in an extremely unusual move, gave his ma a lecture over being a wagon to Bianca. It was Braxton Bollocking day.

We reckon Ricky is on a revenge mission to the Bay.

Boxing brothers

Thursday, May 2nd, 2013

Romeo and Indi had their last hurrah by the lighthouse before he told her about his condition. She said she’s ready to have children with him, bad timing as he’s dying. He wrote her a letter and left it by her side as she slept. Brave move dude.

Heath and Bianca had their engagement party in Angelo’s. It was a classy affair, all of the River Boys put on their fancy cloths. Tamara wore a dress for the first time, thanks to April’s help. Adam’s sister Ricky showed up and Brax did a good bit of flirting with her. That was all going fine until Natalie showed up. Kyle got a bit jealous when looking at Casey and Tamara pashing. Then Cheryl showed up to cause havoc but she liked Tamara, surprisingly. Bianca on the other hand, she hates. Kyle got locked and faced off with Casey, who knocked him out after Ma Braxton told everybody that he has the hots for Tamara.

Liam turned up to say goodbye to the bay, forever. He’s off to spend more time with his son. He had to go really, there were no more employment options left for him in the Bay, he’s tried teacher, rock star, barman, restaurateur, he’s just on the dole now, so he may as well cruise off. Farewell rock star, again, I thought he was gone two weeks ago but this time it’s for real.

Romeo’s reluctant to reveal

Wednesday, May 1st, 2013

Romeo should’ve been a holiday planner, instead of a gym bunny. He took Indi off for the weekend to some beautiful tent by the sea, where they gazed into each other’s eyes and re-affirmed their love. It was the perfect place to tell her that he’s sick, wasn’t it?

NO! Mr. Smith is still dragging his heels on the old sharing-your-life-with-your-wife front. But it’s imminent. He has to tell her soon.

Liam Murphy is leaving the Bay in tomorrow’s episode, a suitably low-key farewell for a character that’s run out of steam. He’s tried every job in the Bay, and there’s nothing left for him to do.

Kyle and Heath are planning an engagement party for Beeyonka. No-one can go, and it’s going to be a disaster.

No-one, that is, except Nosey Natalie and her Braxton fixation. Her fella practically begged her to go along and support Bianca. He said he’d stay at home, LIKE A SAP.

Spencer’s brother has arrived, looking very shifty. He told Spence that Mammy Spence really misses him. It sounds like Daddy Spence is a total dickhead. I hope  they all move to the Bay.

Maddie was still wearing the VMD (very mad dress). Is she trying to out-Roo Roo?

Bay’s Anatomy

Thursday, April 25th, 2013

For a second there, I thought I was watching the wrong show. Between April and dishy doctor-teacher Jake (Twomey?), and Dex and his prankster nurse, it was like being back in Seattle Grace. Are there a few intra-medical romances coming our way? I do hope so.

Casey and Tamara moved in together, in a gaff that Brax had but never used. You could’ve put one of your many house guests in there, Darryl. There was a bit of nudiness, then Casey broke out the moodboards, and decorated the place. He has a real knack. The first interior designer River Boy.

Romeo has my heart broke already. He is croaky, he is bewildered, and he still hasn’t told Indi. Bit mean of him to keep asking his buds to keep his secret, and isn’t he wasting time, the very commodity he’s so concerned about?

Liam Murphy is actually leaving now. He’s giving it another go with Ash. Is that the son or the ex-wife? Either way, tomorrow is probably his last episode, if he obeys the rules of the Summer Bay Time Warp.

Next level alert 2

Monday, April 22nd, 2013

Marilyn walked in on Maddy and Spencer as things were getting hot and heavy. They discussed taking things to the next level in his van but were interrupted. Roo and Harvey had to deal with the fall out and decided to sit them down for the talk. Now Spencer doesn’t think he’s ready while Maddy was trying to pounce on him down the beach. Young love eh?

Dex is feeling much better these days, remembering everything. April on the other hand is having problems dealing with the stress and anxiety of Uni and is reverting to her OCD ways. Sid saw her behaviour and is concerned. She lost the plot when trying to deal with her timetable and came back to the diner in tears. Are college timetables that difficult to follow, especially for somebody who got into medicine?

Nat and Zack had a tête-à-tête in the diner after he had confronted Brax on the beach. Zack asked the River boss to stay away from Nat; he replied that it was Nat who needed to be told to steer clear of him. Liam met Nat on the beach for a chat, wearing full biker gear while she was wearing minuscule gym gear. Does Liam have reptilian blood?

By the way it seems that we got it wrong on Liam, he didn’t leave the Bay after all. He met Romeo on the clifftop last Friday and the kid put Liam’s problems into perspective by revealing his terminal cancer. Hopefully that will snap Liam out of his recent funk. He’ll have to find a job somewhere, not many options open to him in the Bay now.


Monday, April 8th, 2013

Courtney is an amazing rubbish baddie, cast in the Summer Bay mould that also begot Johnny and Hammer. Casey has a vendetta against him, and got stabbed in a big bad-boy bash-up. Casey just has no luck.

Tilda told Gina that she bullied Jett because she fancies him. Gina must have spent the morning in a ditch, on the batter, because she believed Tilda. Poor form, Gina.

Indi and Romeo’s gym was about to open, and they were juggling meetings like old pros. But when Sid called around for a look, the fuses blew and the power went out. Time to get a sparky in. John Palmer had a go, and almost set the place on fire. The power in Angelo’s was also affected; Liam couldn’t even open the till to nick some cash.

Brax spilled his guts to Natalie, and she knocked him back. Form an orderly queue, ladies.

Grudge match

Friday, March 22nd, 2013

How is Heath Liam’s boss in Angelo’s? I thought Liam was the manager and Brax is the owner so I don’t know where Heath comes into it. Heath seemed pretty happy that Liam punched him as it gave him an excuse to fire him, well, pretend to fire him before giving him one last chance, as long as he accepts a demotion. Liam has to suck it up as he needs the money for his son. There are no other options for a man his age given he’s already worked in the school. Turns out Heath is rubbish at managing the place and is running it into the ground.

Jett is in group D according to Tilda/Hanna, a stuck up cow who is in group A. Jett should threaten her with violence and take her lunch money, getting back to his roots. She punched him first, why does he put up with her bullying? He’d kick her ass.

Everyone is looking for work in the diner. Sasha, Rosie and Tamara all asked for a job but Irene couldn’t help them out. Sasha is annoyed with April for helping Tamara find somewhere to live. There’s still a fair bit of bad blood between Sash and her love rival Tamara, now she’s got it in for April and even threw a paper ball at her head in school, which Gina managed to miss somehow. I wouldn’t mess with Sasha, she holds a mean grudge.

Super sleuth Sasha copped on that Rosie doesn’t have a sister and “Hanna” was hired help rather than a blood relation. Rosie flipped when Sasha confronted her and stormed off. Never one to be easily put off she followed her mate home and saw her feeding fish in a fish tank. Not that mysterious, is it?

Stud academy

Tuesday, March 19th, 2013

Jett has been getting lady advice from John and Liam, unfortunately it was conflicting advice. John told him to get out in the middle of the disco and mingle while Liam recommended playing it cool and maintaining an air of mystery. Liam managed to save the day by getting Sasha and Rosie to dance with him, making the other girls jealous. It all worked well and he was the belle of the ball.

Kyle and Casey managed to restrain Nelson and bring him to the YCPD station. Casey was still very ungrateful, despite the help that Kyle gave him. The cops took a statement from Tamara and told her that she’ll have to testify in the manslaughter case against Nelson. Kyle has his own case coming up, with Tamara and Casey acting as witnesses for the prosecution, so he could do with getting on their good side.

Tamara went to Sash and thanked her for helping her and Casey. Sasha feels like it wasn’t meant to be between her and Case, must mean that “the universe” didn’t want it to happen. The universe seems to be responsible for an awful lot of what happens in the Bay.

Who is the new cop in the station? He seems far more efficient that the old crew. Jack and Charlie would have messed this case up by now.

Here is a question for all the viewers. Where is Leah? Adam is dead and his son Jamie is in jail. Surely the coast is clear now and she can return to the Bay?

Divorces and discoveries

Wednesday, March 6th, 2013

Heath and Bianca are united in their desire to build a life with Darcy. Bianca was reluctant initially but as it the usual way in the bay, changed her mind after five minutes. She thought that their chances would be better if she got a divorce from her husband Liam. He was vexed by this, for some reason, it’s a long time since they were together.

His day didn’t get any better when Kyle became the latest Brax bro to work in Angelo’s. Liam questioned his work ethic and wondered if he’d do proper shifts or Heath shifts. Despite Liam’s scepticism Kyle put in a trojan effort and booked in a party for dinner. He’s got Liam onside now, will he be able to do the same with Brax?

Celia revealed that the mysterious thief in the diner was none other than herself. Who knew? Not Alf anyway, he thought it was some fella that she was covering for. Alas that wasn’t the case, his sister has light fingers. He’d better watch out, she’ll be robbing the worms from the bait shop next.

Roo was distraught to discover the runaways ran away. Fear not Ruth, they’ll return as the age profile of the cast is getting a bit older than usual at the moment.

Job opportunities

Wednesday, February 27th, 2013

Spencer and Maddy were so desperate for somewhere warm and safe that they broke into the school. Before long they’ll be mitching off school. While there Maddy showed her mean violin skills. Maybe they should go busking, that would earn them a fortune. Alternatively, they could rely on Roo’s generosity to put them up in a van.

Celia is now working for Alf in the caravan park and wants to become its guest relations manager. All these years and they didn’t realise what they were missing. Not only will she clean the place up but she’ll also enforce a strict moral code among the guests, no kissing or fondling allowed, which doesn’t sound like much crack. Will gambling be allowed?

Liam and Brax are concocting a plan to get back at Adam. They staged a firing incident in front of Adam. He bought it and encouraged Liam to take a job working for him rather than going on the dole. Poor simpleton/psycho Jamie was accosted by a vigilante posse of Kyle and Heath. Jamie ran back to Adam and spilled his guts, saying they should leave town, a proposal which didn’t go down well with his dad. He fell for Heath’s ruse and overheard Brax and Liam using a fake safe house location for Leah as bait. The dupe fell right into the trap and turned around up in the empty house to find himself face to face with his worst nightmare, Kyle “he’s off his head” Braxton.

bring back miles
Original image from This is Oz

all the dead

%d bloggers like this: