Who you gonna call Summer Bay? Ghosts are ten a penny around town these days. The latest spook on the block is our very own Constable Holden. No sooner had Jack shuffled off this mortal coil than he was haunting the hospital and talking to Martha. Let’s hope he makes a better ghost than he did a cop.

But Ghost Jack is only the latest in a long and distinguished line of summer bay spooks and spectres. Who can remember when Bobby appeared to Ailsa on the door of the fridge in the Diner? Great choice Ghost Bobby. Nobody forgot that in a hurry.

Another memorable haunting was when Ghost Shane appeared to a heavily pregnant Angel as she struggled to drive to the hospital through a storm. Are Ghosts allowed to drive motorbike? She was so grateful that she named the baby after him but abbreviated it to just "Shane", rather than "Ghost Shane".

When poor Noah got shot by one of a fierce plague of psychos stalking the bay in recent years, he did manage to reappear to Hayley during his funeral. They made a cute couple even if one of them wasn’t quite there.

Going way back, Blake used to go down to the beach to visit the ghost of his dead girlfriend Meg. She had died down there and decided to haunt the place afterwards. Why did nobody think of calling Ghostbusters?

Looks like Martha will be getting back with Roman now.  Poor oul’ Jack all the same.  Sure haven’t we been saying for years that his inept policing would be the death of him?

Melody looked a bit like Carrie at the formal, and was equally as mad.

Kane magically got out of jail and wants Kirsty back.  Pity that didn’t work for the V-man back in the day; I reckon he would have had more success.

Oh, and Belle may as well move into the hospital now.  Irene spends half her time there, as it is.

Fitzy’s going on maternity leave.  No doubt when she returns the SBPD station will be a deep and smouldering crater, after the chaos that Jack, Charlie and Angelo inevitably wreak.  The Keystone Cops would make a better fist of running the town.

Poor Belle getting battered.  Angelo’s wall punch was impressive, but I wouldn’t like to be him when Irene hears.

“You nearly crossed the line Jack”. When was he ever any other way? He lives so far over the line that he can’t even see it.

What was that whole "we can’t see the future" bit about?  I reckon the writers hate the actor who plays Jack and give him all the stupidest lines.

It is lucky Jack can’t see his own future though, I don’t think he’d like it…

Summer Bay is really coming into the media age; it now has its own radio station.  The Bay FM DJ who was hanging around with Alf seemed like a chipper chappie, and I’d say a few more H&A regulars would give good wireless if they got the chance.

Jack and Martha would of course drive the drama department, while Colleen would be Australia’s answer to Joooooooe Duffy.   Morag might make a good Marian Finucane.  Melody and Geoff could do a radio version of A Prayer at Bedtime .  I wouldn’t put Leah on the sound desk though, she’d get far too flustered.

Now that Belle has hopped on board the “tree hugger bandwagon”, as Irene calls it, she seems to think that the time is right to get police information from her cop boyfriend, Angelo. He’s clearly been well schooled by Jack as it only took 5 minutes worth of protest before he was revealing confidential details about Murray to Belle in the Diner. It also appears that the SBPD have access to everybody’s bank accounts. I’d be worried if I had an account and the likes of Jack could get into it.

So it appears that McGrath has moved on and Fitzy is now Jack and Charlie’s boss. I hope that she’s tougher on Jack than her predecessor. When Jack routinely messes up a case or blabs the details of an investigation down the diner or steals evidence, it’ll be interesting to see if she fires him or takes the McGrath line of giving him “one more chance”. How many final warnings has he got?

So Tony did a stupid thing. A very stupid thing. By sleeping with the blond barmaid extraordinaire, who can serve a double measure and take money for it, he’s put his relationship with Rachel at risk. Usually I would say that he is a sensible type, unlike his dopey son Jack. Well now it appears that the Da is also prone to a brain bypass. Poor Tony. At least it seems it’s the exception, rather than the rule with him.

While Martha was in the coma the doctor told Jack that they feared she might have suffered some brain damage. Given how slow she is, it’s questionable whether anybody would have noticed the difference.