After all that to-and-fro, Bianca and Heath are now engaged. In a mad/nice move, Celia gave Heath her engagement ring, from her marriage that never was. Les sounds like a nice sort.

So, there’s another Home and Away wedding in the works. It’s been 13 months since Bianca’s last big day, and 14 months since she was going to marry the Prince.

When Celia told Alf about her generosity, he told her her work was done, and to pack her bags. Strange logic, but it seemed to work. Celia is off into the wide blue yonder again. Shame, they could do with a older lady for comic relief. Yoo-hoo, only me!

Sasha is becoming fast friends with Maddie and Spence, and Rosie doesn’t like it one bit. The poor child is gone daft with loneliness. So she tried to fake-drown herself in the sea, in order to get Sasha’s attention. I found myself shouting “would ye just float” at the telly. I’d say they were only a few feet into the ocean.

Poor Sasha too, she always attracts the nutters. Maybe she’ll have to “accidentally” kill Rosie too.*

Real-life Sasha and Rosie are on Twitter, see our H&A twitter list here.

* Only messing, Sasha, old chum.

Jamie is a brilliant pathetic baddie. He nicked Jett’s phone, quizzed Colleen about Leah, and texted Veej while pretending to be Jett. JP found the phone in Jamie’s car and confronted him. Jamie was like a deer in headlights; if it wasn’t for Heath’s experience in counter-threats, John would have dragged Jamie down the cop shop.

Adam got Liam to hire a boat for Jamie. What a weird request to make. But Jamie is supposed to kill Heath on the báid, so maybe Adam doesn’t want it traced back to him. It was the worst blackmail effort ever (Do as I say or I’ll get Bianca back on drugs), but it worked.

April’s going to med school. Does that mean she’s leaving soon?

Colleen continues to be brilliant. I thought that Sally would be back for Roo’s wedding, wonder when she’ll appear?

Wow, who would’ve thought Roo and Harvey would actually get hitched, considering their blue yesterday? Probably everyone.

Roo looked lovely, and her dress was slightly less baggy than her usual attire.

But let’s get down to discussing the major event in that episode. Hooroo! Colleen returned, resplendent in a Stars and Stripes shawl. She hasn’t changed a bit. Here’s hoping she sticks around for a while. She also spoke a classic Colleen phrase, “your ship will come home to roost”.

Casey kissed Tamara on the beach, in full view of Sasha. Then he looked very confused. He’s so simple.

So, Romeo and Indi were getting on like a house on fire, once he drunkenly told her there was never a baby. “Come on back to my house Romeo”, she declared. Dr. Sid was wary.

Ruby saw the ex-marrieds on beach being very friendly, and threw a mickey fit. She’s great at tantrums. She accused Indi of being the cause of all her troubles, and Indi said something along the lines of “I’m sorry I created your fake pregnancy”. You’d know she was college-educated, that Walker one. Brax broke up the blue and gave Ruby a very sensible talking-to.

Later, in the Walker house, Romeo tried to kiss Indi, and she surprisingly kicked him out.

Brax and Liam had a little power struggle, and then a love-in. “You’re my top bloke”, sez Brax. Liam is back working at Angelo’s.

There have been a few references to both Charlie and Colleen over the last few episodes. I think memories are improving down Summer Bay way.

It’s at times like this I wish Charlie was still around, with her one expression.

…hooroo, a word most beloved of Colleen Smart. Come back Colleen!

How about you Have a go?

Of course, there’s a Colleen Tumblr! Some amazing pictures there. Sent in by the wonderful Strike Me Roan.

Do you know of any other H&A related sites please?

So, Alf is back. Since he left, Romeo and Indi have broken up, Jet and Lottie arrived, Colleen left, and Heath wore many vests. He’s already re-established himself as local treasure by giving Romeo business advice and turfing Hayley out of the diner.

Of course, Romeo didn’t take the advice. Instead, he lodged some of Ruby’s money (for buying surf stock) into Indi’s bank account. She’ll have spent that on slankets in no time. Unless of course, she’s with Ulster Bank – then who knows when she’ll get the cash.

Marilyn was jumped by someone, I reckon it was Jet robbing her bag, but Flathead says the person looked taller. Only time will tell.

Leah wore a bow in her hair. Strange move, but it was nice all the same.

Jet is some kind of school genius. He doesn’t even need to pay attention to take it all in. Gina and Xavier are keeping a good eye on him.

Hayley tried to off herself by wandering slowly into the surf. Liam galloped after her. Why does he bother? What did his post-it say, by the way?

Well, that’s that. For a moment, there was a glimmer of hope that Colleen might not jet off to Las Vegas, but in the end, she went. John Palmer made sure to get a squeeze before she departed. Alf sent an email that tugged at the heartstrings terribly. Even Morag showed up. Farewell, Miss Groper! We’ll never see her likes again.

Things in the Bay continued as normal after Mrs. Smart left. Jet is still nicking stuff, i.e. Indi’s purse, Gina is still on the case and Xavier had a go as well. All is not well in the Jet household. Poor oul’ Ma Jet is on the way out, by the look of her.

Heath snuck in April’s bedroom window again, but not for a bit of boldness this time. Instead, he built the cot that Bianca had bought for the bub. Ahhh. Breaking, entering and flat-packing. He may hold his horses though, because Bianca went to the hospital in a panic shortly afterwards. Uh-oh. As Kane once said, “If anything happens to the bay-bee…..”!

Mr. Townsend is still getting a rise out of poor Casey. Gina’s well and truly on the Braxton side though. I love Mr. Townsend. He only has one mood, and here it is:

I’m deeply saddened at the news that Colleen and her amazing gold quilted jacket are off to America. Of course, Lancey and Debbie magically want her now that she’s loaded. Although it sounds like Lance still has a grá for Marilyn!

In true Summer Bay fashion, she’s leaving in two days. Quite the hasty departure.

Lottie wants to move in with her da. Dunno why. Her mother must be quite the wagon. Harvey put her off until after his case. He stupidly refused help from legal goddess Morag. Have a nice time in jail, Harve.

Hayley is still off the gear. She’s hooked on Rockstar now. Liam seemed happy enough to go along with her advances.

Firstly, Home and Away is back on RTE TWO. Yippee-ki-ay!

Secondly, what about this Dave Townsend character? Swanning into town (I presume), and instantly swiping the Dickhead crown. He’s harangued Casey and threatened Gina. I personally would love to see him get a River-Boys-style beating.

Hayley is still hanging around the Bay, and back on the junk. So Liam is going to help her go cold turkey. Not sure that’s the best idea. In our house, we think Hayley is headed for an early grave.

Dexter and Lottie are the cutest pair since Tasha and Robbie. Should we call them Dottie or
Lexter?

And no mention of the most burning issue in the Bay – WHAT ABOUT COLLEEN’S JUGS?