Home and Away Ireland » Quotes

Irene advises Will

Flathead — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 22:30:50 +0000

“You made mistakes, big deal, you’re not Robinson Crusoe”. What? Can anyone explain what Irene was on about? Related posts: Irene is shocked Irene gets a storyline Irene Roberts Related posts:

Alf doubts Roo

Flathead — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 22:10:58 +0000

“Oh come off it love, I didn’t fall off the back of a turnip truck.” He never disappoints. No related posts. No related posts.

Eating everything

Ailsa — Thu, 16 Sep 2010 17:54:20 +0000

In that episode, Miles strolled into the diner, and, on not being attended to immediately, shouted “I’m eating everything”, in the vain hope of rousing some service. However, eating everything is his default position, so no-one batted an eyelid. Plus, Leah was lying face-down in the kitchen. AND she wrecked a load of eggs. Turns out she’s working too hard.

I hope Mr. Risotto takes heed. He is working in Angelo’s day and night, and Officer Buxton is not impressed. In fairness, the restaurant is only open about three days. No wonder he’s keeping an eye on things.

Lastly, Romeo and Indigo smooched. Never saw that one coming. Mwah!

Let’s write our own episode

Ailsa — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 19:38:22 +0000

Right, Home and Away is on a wee break. I think the only course of action is to write our own episode.

I’ll start:

______________________________________________________________________

FADE-IN INT. KITCHEN OF SUMMER BAY CARAVAN PARK – DAY

A HANDSOME MAN enters

CLOSE-UP: Alf Stewart

ALF (calling)

Hello? Hello? Strewth, there’s never anyone around when you flamin’ need them.

MEDIUM SHOT – MILES ENTERS FROM HALLWAY

MILES (mumbling with mouth full of food)

Oh, Alf, what’s with all the commotion?

ALF (hurriedly)

You’ll never flamin’ guess what’s just happened down at the bait shop, come and help or I’ll tan your backside!

______________________________________________________________________

Over to you, there.

Doing it tough

Ailsa — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 21:11:59 +0000

“Doing it tough” is the current phrase du jour in Summer Bay, and with good reason.

Aden’s still doing it tough due to Belle’s death. Surprisingly he didn’t get over it in a week. I think the Summer Bay time warp is weakening.
Sid is doing it tough trying to ward off Nicole.
Charlie’s doing it tough trying to nail Grant for every rape in Oz.
Jai is doing it tough because he can’t get his hands on Annie.
Ruby’s doing it tough because she can’t decide between Xavier and Geoff.
Widower dude’s doing it tough because he has a baby and no wife to help with the childrearing. Rachel or Leah will sort that out for him.
Hugo and Confused Martha are doing it tough because the authorities don’t like their shipwreck idea.
Kirsty and Miles are doing it tough because they’re having a babog and only one of them is bothered with it.

Brendan is the only one having any craic; I wonder what Ruby II was wearing when he was talking to her?

Gawd Save Ireland

Ailsa — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 20:00:45 +0000

It’s a badly-kept secret that Irene feels a great affinity with our fair isle. So we decided to celebrate it in t-shirt form. Now you can pray along with Irene, or just show your support for eh, her support.

gawdsaveireland

Apparently the phrase “God save Ireland” comes from a rebel song. Home and Away is so educational.

Have you got rocks in your head?

Ailsa — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 21:03:16 +0000

Lynne truly has some classic lines. Anytime someone goes a bit daft, she’s enquiring about the contents of their skull. Personally, I think there are a few pebbles rattling around in her noggin, as she would say herself. The reason being that her hair is nuts. It hasn’t been the same since she got out of jail. It’s like she tried to curl her hair but failed. Buy that woman a GHD, someone. It’s actually not that bad in the picture below.

(image from whatsontv.co.uk)

“This town would be stuffed without the SES and you know it”

Flathead — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 22:24:16 +0000

Alf did have a point when he told Irene off. The SES are called into action every 5 minutes at the rate of accidents in the Bay. It must have the highest DPC (disaster per capita) rate in Australia. Oh my Gawdfather! Related posts: Move over Rachel, there’s a new expert in town Related posts:

Move over Rachel, there’s a new expert in town

In the kingdom of the blind

Flathead — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 18:24:37 +0000

“Even blind Freddy could see that love.”

Who is this blind Freddy that Irene keeps banging on about? Apparently he’s quite observant. Maybe he’s not blind at all. It’s a pity that he’s not on the school trip to the bush as he might have spotted Trey making a deathlist and Jai succumbing to an infected gunshot wound. Yet again, a field trip turns into a disaster. Why does anybody ever leave the bay?

Colleen defends her short film festival

Flathead — Mon, 06 Jul 2009 18:40:48 +0000

“Just because you’ve no culture Alf Stewart, doesn’t mean you have to knock the rest of us thespians”. Colleen gets all of the best lines. Related posts: Cat fighting Colleen Classic Colleen A few nuts short of a squirrel house Related posts:

Wallopers

Ailsa — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 16:03:00 +0000

‘You’re lucky I didn’t call the flamin’ wallopers!’ sez Alf, referring to the cops. I wonder how they got that nickname? Related posts: Psychedelic nightmare Let’s write our own episode Alf on feminism Related posts:

Classic Colleen

Flathead — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 19:41:28 +0000

“The rumour’s been spreading like wildlife” according to Colleen. But what type of wildlife? A koala? A dingo? Maybe it was the fabled summer bay Bunyip. Related posts: Summer Bay Bunyip Colleen defends her short film festival A classic Related posts:

Irene to Belle

Flathead — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 17:20:28 +0000

“You get your boney butt back here girlie!” Related posts: Irene – wriggle Irene in Panto Belle tried to make him go to rehab, he said “no no no” Related posts:

Oh GAWD!

Ailsa — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 16:03:40 +0000

Irene’s date offered her a glass of very posh wine on their first date down the docks. The background music hummed ominously as she accepted it, but she did put it aside. Oh my gawdfather, will she fall off the wagon to win Lou’s heart? Related posts: Gawd Save Ireland Welcome to Summer Bay Like [...] Related posts:

Charlie warns Jack

Flathead — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 12:12:59 +0000

“You nearly crossed the line Jack”. When was he ever any other way? He lives so far over the line that he can’t even see it. Related posts: Jack – integrity – wha’? I hate Jack A first for Jack Related posts:

Finally

Flathead — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 19:16:51 +0000

“Questionable hairstyle” was what Mathilda’s Uni room mate said when she saw the photo of Ric. Not half. Related posts: “Everything’s finally coming together for us” Related posts:

“Everything’s finally coming together for us”

True that

Flathead — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 19:14:30 +0000

“Men focus, women fuss. It’s the nature of things” according to Ross when Irene asked him how he had time for a coffee on the morning of his wedding. Related posts: Scent of a Derro Please let it be true Alf on feminism Related posts:

Coleen protests her innocence

Flathead — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 18:14:40 +0000

“I’ve never sent a false pretext in my life” was what Colleen said to Betty in the Diner as they spied on Morag. Related posts: Current State of Affairs Related posts:

Current State of Affairs

Irene to a spaced out Rick

Flathead — Mon, 12 May 2008 19:14:28 +0000

“Earth to Bugalugs.” Rick was taken aback at the news to Colleen being his great aunt. Related posts: Home and Away stars on Channel 5 UK Irene Roberts Irene is shocked Related posts:

Irene is shocked

Flathead — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 19:01:47 +0000

“Oh my gawdfather!” Irene upon seeing the newspaper headline about Sally’s dismissal. Apparently the usual “oh gawd” just doesn’t cut it anymore. I bet Drew and Belle were impressed. Related posts: Irene Roberts Irene – Mickies Poor oul’ Belle Related posts: