The lives and loves of Martha McKenzie

July 1st, 2010 by Flathead

Methodical? Never.

Mysterious? Sometimes.

Misunderstood? Often

Monogamous? Rarely.

Moron? Always.

Martha.  Summer bay is a poorer place without it’s resident wild card. You can say many things about her but life was never dull with her around. It’s hard to know where to start with her.

She arrived in town with a flash when Jack dared her to streak naked along the seafront.  Alf was unimpressed but he had to get used to these kind of shenanigans from his grand daughter.  She later went onto appear in a strip club as a pole dancer which was classic H&A viewing.  She wasn’t slow in showing her assets.

Yes, it was never dull with old Martha.  She was the subject of regular kidnappings, attempted murder, car crashes, cancer, miscarriages and any kind of disaster going really.  The bay will miss it’s resident queen of drama.

She knew when to fight for what was right, such as when she saved Tasha from Mama Rose and the cult.  She also knew when to forgive and forget with Jonah’s past and Hugo’s people smuggling.  Bit of a goldfish memory.

Martha had a talent for making snap decisions.  This is what made herself and Jack such a good match.  Life changing choices like “I’m going to buy a farm”, “I’m adopting Bum bum” or “I’m leaving the bay” would be made in space of a lunch hour.  It would often be followed by the rational of “I’ve thought about it” –  for a whole five minutes, went unsaid.

What of her lovers?  Let us count the names.  I’ll start with Jack. I wonder if we can name them all?

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17 Responses to “The lives and loves of Martha McKenzie”

  1. Ailsa Says:

    Maybe five whole minutes of Martha-thought is as much as she can do.

  2. Justice Bellingham Says:

    Wasn’t she on drugs as well at one stage when she was living in Sally’s house and moved into the flat above the old diner then when Sally tried to do an intervention?

  3. strikemeroan Says:

    She was in that flat for a while all right, I seem to remember Belle moving in at one stage and them butting heads? I don’t remember the drugs, it was probably like when Kirsty ‘Pillhead’ took an E tablet and NEARLY DIED

  4. Ailsa Says:

    The best drugs storyline ever was Duncan and Jade and the “nighty nights”. Class.

  5. Flathead Says:

    I don’t remember Martha on drugs but that could be right. Was that when she was doing the dancing?

  6. Justice Bellingham Says:

    I think it was around the time she was dancing. Think she was possibly arrested?

  7. Drew's Shrew Says:

    I miss her horse face and extreme yo yo emotions.

    Where’s the list of shags then? I’ve forgotten almost all of them.

  8. Flathead Says:

    Strikemeroan made a good start on the shag list in his recent comment on the Martha and Hugo leaving post. Here’s his tally.

    Jack
    Cam the sleazy nightclub owner
    Jack again
    Roman
    Michael/Jonah the Believers guy
    Hugo
    Liam Murphy
    Hugo again

  9. lanos86 Says:

    and ash, remember jack’s “best friend” that appeared, who was married?

  10. strikemeroan Says:

    I’m a she! But then my name is Alf ‘Not a Sheila’ Stewart’s catchphrase, so easy mistake to make. That list only scratches the surface of Martha’s conquests – I didn’t even know she’d been with Jesse till someone here said it!

  11. strikemeroan Says:

    I think her romantic life is going to need its own Wikipedia page

  12. God Save Ireland! Says:

    How she had time for all those men when she had such a busy career poking around the farm with a pitch fork in hot pants, and wiping tables in the juice bar is beyond me…!

  13. strikemeroan Says:

    Don’t forget the cowboy boots. She must have been very busy mending and re-soling them

  14. Flamin' Mongrel Says:

    Let’s not forget that she was a qualified electrician. And she also went out with your man Corey who held her hostage or something. And she was only supposed to be about 24. Talk about living life to the max

  15. PeterKevin Says:

    She certainly kept busy. Tis a bit of a surprise that she didn’t find time for Angelo. He would be fairly obvious as she had a thing for men in uniform.

  16. Flathead Says:

    What was the name of the club that Cam owned? The one where Martha did the pole dancing.

  17. PeterKevin Says:

    Whoo thats a tough question !! The name of the Club, sorry we were just a bit distrcated by what went on there rather than the name of the place… Remember when Peter had his bucks night there and Martha turned out to be the entertainment, brilliant !!! And then it burned down so now all the bucks’ nights have to be at the Surf Club!!!!

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